HMR Decision Free Diet – Nine Month Review and Progress Pictures
I swore I wasn’t ever going to post progress pictures on my blog. When I first started writing about the HMR Diet, I wanted my experience to be anonymous. I just needed a place where I could explore what I was learning, thinking, and feeling. However I realize now that I can’t be anonymous at this point. Not because so many people I know read this blog now, but because it would be selfish of me.
When I started HMR, I craved success stories. I wanted to see progress pictures. Even now I buy magazines like People touting normal people losing weight because it inspires me and shows me we can all do it. So at the end of this post I will share my nine month pictures.
First, I want to explore my thoughts. I am officially down 122 pounds at nine months and one week. I have also begun my transition to Healthy Solutions (started last week at the nine month mark). When I started this program I gave myself one year to be on Decision Free. My mental framing that it would take this long kept me going — knowing there would be an eventual end. However a year seemed too long so I think the desire to transition earlier motivated me to stay in the box and to seize every fitness opportunity I could.
I have been in the box every day since starting the program. I have had a few emotional eating days but used meal replacements when other tools like journaling or exercise weren’t cutting it. I have had two or three weeks where I didn’t lose weight (also didn’t gain) and I missed two weeks of weigh ins for travel (one week in June and one a couple weeks later in July). I can say from experience that being away from class made it harder to stay on the program because those in person accountability points aren’t just to keep up in check but also have me leaving class feeling refreshed and motivated.
When I started this diet walking at 3.0 on the treadmill was fast and there were days where walking at 2.0 for 40 minutes while watching an episode of Scandal was a big workout. I swam laps but only a couple and very slowly.
This past Sunday, just a couple of days after my nine month anniversary, I ran my first half marathon since starting HMR. And by ran, I actually ran and killed my previous PR by over 50 minutes! Super proud of this picture because I feel like it captures how far I have come:
Was it easy? Never. But did it become habit? Yes. When you reframe away from what you can’t have and focus on what you can, it makes it so much easier to manage Decision Free. When you focus on each day as becoming the best person you can be, the days pile up into making you an awesome person. When you seize every opportunity for fitness and give it everything you have rather than make excuses then you find yourself seeing physical results even when the scale moves slowly or not at all.
You can make excuses or you can make your move. I had ALL the injuries. Bad knees. Sciatica. Lower back pain. Asthma. I work 40+ hours during the week and 20+ weekends a year. I am traveling ALL the time. I am not wealthy. I don’t live alone. I spend time around temptation EVERY day. And I HAVE found success but it wasn’t handed to me. I had to fight for every single pound and while I have had people tell me I “make it look easy” — it hasn’t been. But nothing amazing is easy.
Now I am transitioning to Healthy Solutions and although I am loving the produce and I am trying to take it slowly, I won’t lie that I am also scared. I have confidence in myself but I am anxious and I can’t articulate why, other than I am constantly entering new territory and that keeps me on my toes.
I teach public speaking – it’s one of the biggest fears in America. Thus I understand having unexplained anxiety and trying to manage and overcome to the best of our abilities. I practice positive visualization (ordering a Healthy Solutions option at a restaurant when I inevitably go out) and I carry a touchstone to keep me grounded when I need to make a decision. I journal my food and exercise. I practice tricks like always keeping a zero calorie beverage in my hand in social settings. And I expel the rest of the nervousness through exercise. I will manage my anxiety like I will manage my weight. One day at a time with mindfulness and positive energy. And no excuses.
A rather lengthy post. And I feel like I have so much more to say. But tomorrow we meet up with our students for the first time this school year so I am off to bed. But as promised, here are my nine month progress pictures. I am proud of my hard work and continue to motivate myself every day to excel so that the work I have done is honored and not destroyed.
HMR Creole Caps – A Healthy Solutions Recipe
I kicked off my transition from HMR Decision Free to HMR Healthy Solutions on August 13th and have been busy crafting all sorts of new dishes incorporating veggies and fruits into my diet! Hoping to share many of them here, however I will also be back to posting at Uncovering Food with any recipes I create that don’t use HMR products. I am also starting a new tab off of the main page of Healthy Academic which will include Healthy Solutions friendly recipes from Uncovering Food to make it easier for anyone in need of something new to try but who don’t want to surf through recipes that are outside of the box!
Speaking of being outside of the box… If you are on Decision Free, you can filter to only get posts and recipes about Decision Free so you aren’t tempted with the produce posts by clicking on the tags to the right! I COMPLETELY understand the temptations that exist outside of the Decision Free bubble and hope that helps make life easier for you as I imagine it would have for me.
THIS was one of the first things I played with and it was SUPER filling and only added 40 additional calories (20 per portobello mushroom cap) to the Chicken Creole entree! The hot sauce soaks into the cap and the seasoning flavors the outside of the cap, contributing to the overall flavor of the dish.
Creole Caps
- 1 HMR Chicken Creole entree
- 2 portobello mushroom caps – cleaned off and stems removed
- Cajun seasoning
- Hot sauce
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Sprinkle Cajun seasoning on the inside and outside of two portobello caps and then pour some Louisiana hot sauce inside the cap. Divide up a Creole Chicken entree between them and sprinkled on more Cajun seasoning.
Bake for 25 minutes.
Dirty Chai Latte – An HMR Diet Recipe
Holy moly folks! Starbucks has an iced coffee (unsweetened) that you can buy in stores! I went to my local Safeway last night and found a carafe of coffee in with the milks and juices after hearing about it from a friend. It was much cheaper than buying it at the cafe (although you could probably make your own cold brew at home for cheaper – I will try that someday). I had also picked up some sugar free chai syrup from DaVinci this last week, so an idea was brewing (haha get it? BREWING! okay sorry…) to try to make one of my favorite pre-HMR beverages.
A dirty chai is a chai latte with a shot of espresso. It is delicious and a total pick me up. But chai syrup and milk are both really high in calories, making this drink a TOTAL calorie bomb! Instead I made a super filling blended shake that was totally satisfying for only 170 calories!
Dirty Chai HMR Style
- 8 ounces cold brew coffee
- 8 pumps sugar free chai syrup (about 2 ounces)
- 1 HMR 800 Vanilla shake packet
- 8 to 10 ice cubes
Blend everything but the ice first then add the ice and blend to desired consistency. SO GOOD! And when it gets colder I will be attempting a hot version that won’t have as much volume without the ice but should still be a fabulous morning treat!
Dessert Pizza on HMR Decision Free
I am running now pretty consistently as I see half marathons approaching quickly on the calendar. Following my long runs I try to have some broth or something with sodium to replace lost salt from the run. However I am not usually really hungry. It means that some evenings I have a little extra food I need to consume to meet my minimum prescription!
This week I will begin to transition to Healthy Solutions. I have been on the HMR Decision Free diet for nine long months and haven’t stepped outside of it. I am down 117 pounds at the nine month mark and will be starting the school year soon, thus it was in my best interest as I get closer to my goal but needed to also manage the stress of the new school year, that I transition now. So I was feeling a little bit of awesome on Sunday when I had two shakes left in my Decision Free prescription and wanted to make something special.
This recipe isn’t really much of a new recipe at all. It uses other recipes to create a giant frosted cookie!
I used my basic muffin recipe but used a vanilla bean syrup instead of the chai and rum syrups. I also only made one-third of the recipe (one oatmeal, one 70 shake, 1/4 cup syrup, 1/2 cup water, 1 tsp baking powder) and then I poured it out onto a silpat mat on a cookie sheet (parchment paper on a cookie sheet would also work). Then I baked it for about 15 minutes until it was browned slightly on top.
I let the giant cookie cool before removing it from the cookie sheet. Meanwhile I made an HMR chocolate 70 into a pudding per packet description. I spread it out on top of the giant cookie like frosting and used a pizza cutter to slice the dessert pizza.
This is a very calorie dense dish for HMR – it’s about 430 calories! And depending on your prescription it may be more than 2 shakes (I know on my Healthy Solutions prescription is it four shakes!). So this is a rare special treat and I drank a lot of water with it. However it was super satisfying and a perfect way to top off an awesome day of running!
I know it isn’t always a good idea to celebrate with food. I usually find other ways to celebrate accomplishments like getting a new nail polish or watching a trashy tv show I like. How do you celebrate without food?
Almond Roca Mocha Frappe
I have been working out every morning since I started teaching at summer debate institute. I figure it will help transition me into the school year while allowing me to beat the heat. And when I run in my local neighborhood, I end the run with a special treat! I get a trenta (aka really big!) unsweetened passion iced tea from Starbucks to enjoy on the walk back to my apartment. While I am there, I also pick up a tall (aka small) black coffee.
After drinking the iced tea, I have a perfect vessel to carry a homemade blended coffee beverage to work, which I make right after I shower and get dressed for the day!
Today’s shake was so delicious I had to share right away!
- 1 HMR Diet Chocolate Shake (I use the 800)
- 12 oz black coffee chilled (I throw my cup in the freezer while I shower and get ready)
- 2 oz Torani SF Almond Roca syrup
- 8 ice cubes (or the amount you want for desired texture)
Blend away and enjoy! A perfect sweet treat to jump start your day!
Mini Meatloaf Muffins – an HMR diet recipe to delight!
I have mentioned before that I love my HMR Core and On-Going classes. We share recipes and stories and I absolutely love the support we give each other. One of my classmates loves to play around with the HMR products and made an awesome meatloaf that she shared on her blog. I have also played with the chili and oatmeal to make burgers which I shared in December as well as submitted to the HMR Web site.
Over the summer I have been to a lot of cookouts and I wanted a way to enjoy BBQs while staying in the box on the Decision Free diet. So I took the meatloaf recipe and played around to create my own portable mini-meatloaf bites!
Mini Meatloaf Muffins
- 2 HMR Turkey Chili Entrees
- 2 HMR Oatmeals (I keep the fruit in the recipe for bites of sweet bbq sauce flavor)
- 1/2 tsp liquid smoke
- 1.5 tsp Worcestershire sauce (I use Annie’s vegan version of the sauce)
- 1 tsp hot sauce
- 4 tbsp water
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray mini muffin pan with cooking spray (you will want a pan that has 24 muffin wells).
Mix chili and oatmeal. Microwave for one minute. Add in remaining ingredients. Divide into the 24 mini-muffin wells. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes (my oven took 27 but my convection toaster oven only took 25). You want the muffins firm but not burnt. They will be moist in the middle so be careful removing them from tin.
I made a dipping sauce of 1 tbsp no-sugar ketchup, 1/2 tbsp low-sodium soy sauce, and 1/2 tsp sriracha sauce. I also used mustard. Play around with your favorite sauces or try my classmate’s special sauce recipe included on her meatloaf blog post!
One half of this recipe is 12 mini-muffins and is one entree and one oatmeal for calculation purposes.
Tastes like pizza? Doctoring HMR Chicken Pasta Parm
I love pizza. It was a major weakness pre-HMR because I could polish off a whole pizza without thinking. And while I miss pizza and am spending time during my HMR journey thinking about how I can approach this food in the future, I have been working to attempt the flavors while staying in the box.
I think I have done a pretty good job capturing the flavor profile (or I have been in the box too long!). I posted a picture above with the condiments I used but you can probably find different brands that are HMR friendly.
This entire dish revolves around the chicken pasta parm entree which already has the Italian theme going on. It has a tomato sauce with a cheesey taste, a carby component, and chicken. You can amp up the sauce with fresh or dried herbs if you want.
I add the cheese powder to amp up the cheese flavor. I add the bacon salt because it adds a mild smokey taste that reminds me of a pepperoni or bacon garnish. I also love heat and pile on the chili flakes on a real pizza so I add this and then add some drops of Sriracha which has a sweet and spicy taste that I think rounds out the pizza. If you hate spice then you can turn those down or leave them out but in addition to heat I also think these two additions help amp the tomato flavor.
I prepare the dish by microwaving the entree and then sprinkling the condiments on top. Then I get the layered flavor with each spoonful of the entree.
Did you enjoy pizza pre-HMR or some other favorite dish? Have you attempted to find that flavor profile and how did you do it?
When Willpower Isn’t Enough
This has been a hard post to write and I have been mulling about it for a couple of days. I am currently in New Orleans aka “The Big Easy” aka Food Culture Lives Here aka a really tough trip to be on while on the Decision Free HMR Diet. However, I needed to work some things out and since that’s why I started this blog, I need to get it all out here.
I have been on Decision Free for 35 weeks and am currently in week 36. I have not slipped outside of the box once. Knowing my history with diets, I knew when I started that I couldn’t have a cheat meal and not risk derailing like so many diets before.
I am now at my lightest weight ever. Heck, I showed up on Saturday morning on a red-eye and decided to sign up for a 5k in downtown New Orleans that evening and ran it in under 31 minutes! I am so much healthier than I was in November when I started. (And crazier… do you know how hot and humid it is here?!?)
The problem with getting lighter and healthier is that I am finding it harder and harder to stay HMRStrong and inside the box. I have been on the road for most of July between personal and professional travel – I have survived three red-eyes, a week in Disney World, hours upon hours of stressful travel delays, revisiting old eating haunts in Boston… so much temptation. It’s becoming ridiculously hard to say no to temptations because I feel so much better than I ever have. My willpower is weakening by the day.
My health instructor has this demonstration that he does when he talks about willpower. He holds a pencil up in the air and tells us that eventually that arm will give out. Willpower isn’t enough – it can only take you so far. And my arm definitely wants to drop the pencil.
So I am in one of the most food-centric cities in the world and trying not to eat everything around me. Instead I am practicing more is better but second guessing after the ninth meal replacement if maybe that one bite of duck sausage or crawfish wouldn’t have been easier. Yet knowing full-well it wouldn’t have been “just one bite.”
What isn’t helping is that my weight loss has slowed down to about a pound a week for the last couple of weeks. I knew it would probably slow eventually. I also know how water math works and that I might see a bigger loss in the future. Additionally I have been weighing in right after returning from trips and I know that travel fundamentally messes with my routine and body. But the slowdown has me second-guessing if it isn’t time to stop. Rationally, I know I have a ways to go. I am still overweight and still have so much to do to make myself healthier.
The siren call of food will continue to beckon for the rest of my life. I know this. It will beckon whether I am “Decision Free” or in “Healthy Solutions” or fully transitioned into “Phase Two.” I know that the time I live “in the box” allows me the time to evaluate “The Gap” and learn how to handle these tough situations while still holding a barrier to protect myself from making those decisions now.
This is going to be a tough week. I will continue to be tested. I planned ahead and made HMR muffins and biscuits to carry at all times (like last night in the French Quarter) and brought bars and extra shakes and entrees. I have fitness plans in place. And I have work to throw myself into during the weekdays to keep me away from food. I have worked way too hard for way too long to not see this to the end. I want to be as successful as I can be. I want to do this the right way. I just needed to talk myself through my thoughts and remind myself that I can do it. It will be hard. Life is hard. As I tell my seniors going into their last debates – “Give it everything you have. Leave it all on the table. Do your absolute best. Because win or lose this debate, you want to look back and have no regrets about the choices you made. You’ve got this.”
Savory HMR Diet Biscuits
Travel continues to guide my experimentation in the kitchen. I wanted a savory option that could be easily carried on planes, trains, and automobiles!
The 70 shakes have an egg protein in them that helps with the muffins but wouldn’t work well for a savory biscuit. I use the chicken soup but it took awhile to keep the end product from being very dense. The secret is stirring in the baking powder just enough so it’s mixed and activates but not to over stir and lose the bubbles that make it fluffy! I also use a 2-tbsp scoop to portion out the dough on the silpat which means less handling and fewer bubbles lost!
Savory Cheddar Muffins
- 2 HMR Oatmeal
- 2 HMR Chicken Soup
- 2 tbsp Molly Cheese
- 1 cup water
- 1/4 cup water
- 2 tsp baking powder
Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
Mix oatmeal and 1 cup of water. Microwave for two minutes. Stir and let stand for several minutes.
Add in soup, cheese powder and the remaining ¼ cup of water. Stir until combined.
Once dough is mixed, add baking powder. Carefully fold in without losing the air bubbles.
Gently scoop onto a baking pan covered with a silpat mat or parchment paper.
Bake for 15 to 25 minutes until the biscuit is cooked through. Cooking times will vary significantly based on how big you make each biscuit and your personal oven calibration.
This recipe makes six ½ shake servings of three baby biscuits for my prescription.
Don’t forget this is a low-density preparation of the soup and oatmeal. Make sure to drink lots of fluids while enjoying these!
Disney World Decision Free: Vacationing on the HMR Diet
During my 34 weeks on the HMR Decision Free diet, I have traveled more than the average American. And while some of it has been for fun, the majority has been work related and thus relatively regimented. So when I decided to visit my sister for a week in Florida and we decided to spend three of those days in the land of Disney, I got a little anxious about staying in the box.
First, a spoiler, I survived! However I thought it would be helpful to write about my experience for others and also as a reminder to myself for future trips.
According to the WDW Web site:
“Guests with food allergies or intolerances are allowed to bring food into Walt Disney World theme parks and dining locations. When entering a park, simply inform the Security at bag check that someone in the party has a food allergy or intolerance.
Refrigerating and Heating Personal Food Items
Guests staying at a Disney Resort hotel who have items that need to be refrigerated should ask the Front Desk to have a refrigerator placed in the room, subject to availability. An additional charge may apply.Please note that Cast Members are prohibited from storing, preparing, cooking or reheating any food brought into our Resorts or theme parks by Guests.”
I had no issues with Security and didn’t even need to inform them about the food I was bringing in, they must see a lot of things come through.
Before we left, I baked both savory and sweet HMR mini muffins using the oatmeals, soups and 70 shakes. You can find some of my recipes here. I portioned them out into individual servings that were equivalent of a half a shake for me and a full shake for my Healthy Solutions at Home sister.
I also packed a shaker bottle with two 800 shakes, a 70 shake, and a Benefit Bar. As pictured here:
We also each packed an entree that could be enjoyed cold (Five Bean casserole!), several types of sugar free gum, and a sandwich baggie full of various water flavor squeeze-ins like Crystal Light Liquid (mmmm Sangria and Strawberry Lemonade!) and Dasani Drops (Cherry Pomegranate FTW). The gum and water flavorings allowed us to change up flavors we were experiencing without increasing our caloric intake.
Next, we each packed an empty water bottle to refill throughout the park. We quickly learned you could walk up to vendors who had fountain drink machines and request cups of ice water for free! We would fill up our water bottles with refreshing cold water and play with flavorings. We also purchased various diet sodas and unsweetened iced teas when we wanted a special treat.
The secrets for me were front-loading and keeping myself occupied. I ate an entree before we left in the morning and drank a giant bottle of water. Then I made sure to always have a low calorie beverage in my hand (yay iced water!) so that I could drink whenever I was tempted with food. And I won’t lie… I was tempted! I never craved a turkey leg before (I have never had one) and it was all I could think about for an hour or so after walking past a booth selling them. But we moved away from that part of the park, I enjoyed a couple of flavored waters and bites of a benefit bar, and I stayed in the box.
I think it is easy to give up your diet when you are on vacation. Your schedule is switched up and you are relaxing. You can justify things because you “deserve” them or it’s a special treat. But what I asked myself was if I were never going to return to Disney World, could I live without ever trying X or Y? And the answer I figured out was that I would be fine.
And I am planning my return. My sister and I are all signed up for the Disney Princess Half Marathon in February! So if that turkey leg still sounds good after running 13.1 miles, I may let myself have a bite. But I will be in control of the food rather than allowing it to control me. I will plan for the food. I will also be in a place by then where I have not only transitioned into Phase Two but I will have lived in Phase Two for several months.
I am proud of my success of staying in the box but I also realize my vacation wasn’t ruined by not eating Gap foods. I didn’t need a turkey leg or margarita or mouse-shaped pretzel to complete my experience. This realization has helped me further separate food from my day to day life. Food is fuel and it can be a delicious experience but it is not the whole experience.
Now to remember this all as I head into two weeks of travel into major “foodie” cities like New Orleans!
Curried Mustard HMR Bean Cakes
After spending months of eating cold HMR Five Bean Casserole at debate tournaments, I was determined to find a new way to enjoy it. I have been playing with this recipe for almost two months trying to find a balance of flavors and while these pack a flavorful punch, I am sure there are still ways to play with it even more. This is the entree of the month at my clinic and I am traveling a fair amount in July, so I will continue to tweak it and will add modification suggestions if any turn out. I have also frozen two batches for upcoming trips, so I will also post how it travels.
I have made these to enjoy at parties and on road trips. They are great warm and cold!
Curried Mustard HMR Bean Cakes
- 1 HMR Five-Bean Casserole
- 1 HMR Oatmeal
- 1/2 cup of water
- 2 tsp dried minced onion
- 1 tsp yellow mustard
- 1/2 tsp curry powder
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 1/4 tsp garlic powder
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Prepare baking sheet with a silpat/silicone baking mat lightly sprayed with cooking spray. I use a small baking ring to form my cakes and I also lightly spray the inside of the ring with cooking spray.
Mix all ingredients *except* the casserole in a microwave-safe bowl and microwave for 90 seconds. Add in casserole and mix well.
Spoon mixture into ring molds or make small mounds on your cooking sheet. If using ring mold, press down lightly to pack the mixture together before gently lifting the ring mold.
Bake for 25-35 minutes depending on your oven. You want the cake to be relatively firm. You do not need to flip over the cakes, however it is optional after 25 or 30 minutes depending on the thickness of the cake if you want it browned on both sides. The cakes pictured were not flipped over during the baking process.
This recipe made about 8 cakes. On my prescription it is a shake and an entree. Please remember this is a low-volume preparation for the shake, so drink lots of fluid to help with the volume/fullness!
How to lose weight the easy way…
Cut off an arm!
But on a serious note, I have recently learned from friends that a few acquaintances have been overheard saying I am losing weight “the easy way” and my only wish is that I had heard them say it.
I am not big on confrontation, but I do think this is an issue that needs confronting. There is not an “easy” way to lose weight and I am so sick of all of the judgement that exists about various diet and health choices. From the stigma of weight loss surgery to the negative attitudes about meal replacements, I just don’t understand why people feel they have the right to label one method or another “easy.”
I have been on the HMR Diet for 227 days. That is 227 days where I have had to say no to all the delicious food out there in the world. It’s 227 days of eating the same general meals. It’s 227 days of dragging my butt to do some sort of exercise. It’s 227 days of mental and physical battles.
And yes, I have lost over 100 pounds in those 227 days. And yes, that seems fast. But to me those 227 days seem like years and years of struggling.
In truth, it has been years of struggle. My first attempt at a diet was in high school when I went with my mother to a Weight Watchers meeting. And I have been dieting in some form ever since.
I know how hard it is to count calories, points, carbs, vegetables, meal replacements, cups of juice, glasses of water, grams of protein and more. None of it is easy.
The difference this time is that I have found success because I have found something I can manage. Which makes it look easy.
However, I still have to fight to get every pound off. I have to take notes and learn in every health class so I can continue to form habits to keep the weight off once it is gone. I will have to continue my health education when I begin the long process of transitioning from Phase One Decision Free to Healthy Solutions and eventually to Phase Two. It is a long and time consuming process but it is what I need to do to be successful.
Ultimately when I hear someone say someone took the “easy way out” to lose weight, what I hear is jealousy. It is the same jealousy I could hear coming from my mouth years ago when I watched someone else be successful in their weight loss journey taking a different route than the diet I had prescribed myself to. I wasn’t successful. She was. Clearly her path was easier.
I was wrong about her path. And if you think my path has been easy, you are also wrong.
It sure as hell hasn’t been easy. But it does work for me. And I am healthier because of it. You are welcome to join me.
Vanilla Scented S’mores Shake
Reflecting on summer evenings with friends pre-HMR takes me to making s’mores with homemade vanilla marshmallows. The rich sweet flavors were what I attempted to recreate with this shake and it didn’t disappoint. I hear there is a sugar free toasted marshmallow syrup that exists but I haven’t seen it yet to try out.
1 HMR Chocolate 800 packet
2 ounces Torani SF S’Mores syrup
1 tsp Vanilla extract
1 cup of water
8 ice cubes
Blend all ingredients except ice together to mix. Add ice and blend until fluffy. Enjoy!
I bet this would also make a delicious hot beverage – it’s on my list of drinks to try!
Salted Lavender-Vanilla Chocolate Truffle Pudding
This week’s HMR meal replacement homework was to try the pudding in a new way. I have made lots of puddings over my weeks on the diet so trying a new way seemed like a challenge.
This afternoon I met friends at the San Francisco Ferry Building. A total foodie haven! When we wandered by a gourmet chocolate shop, I was inspired to take an earlier shake recipe and modify it a bit to turn it into a rich pudding.
Be warned that lavender extract is VERY strong and the amount I use may be too much for most people. If you are new to using lavender oil, try using just a drop or two.
Salted Lavender-Vanilla Chocolate Truffle Pudding
1 HMR 70 Chocolate Shake Packet
1/8 tsp Lavender Extract (or less!)
1/4 tsp Vanilla Extract
1 tsp Unsweetened Cocoa
2 ounces Water
1-2 pinches Flake Salt
Mix all ingredients except salt together until creamy (I use a tiny whisk but a spoon should also work). Sprinkle salt on top.
100 pounds lost. A reflection.
This week I officially hit the 100 pound weight loss club. Spoiler alert: It’s not an actual club. No clubhouse and no secret handshake. At least not that I am yet aware of.
As friends have learned about my accomplishment, I have had a couple ask me how it feels to have lost 100 pounds. And I don’t really know how to answer.
I want to say it feels fabulous. I want to tell them how awesome I feel. I want to extrapolate on the health benefits I am seeing both physically and mentally.
But I am hung up on something bigger.
I let myself get to the point where I needed to lose over 100 pounds.
In this truth lies the complexity of the triumph.
I started running while on this weight-loss journey. I have run several races and have signed up for many more. Every race so far I have had a faster time than the previous race. I want to shout my PRs from the roof top. I earned those. I am taking myself to new places I have never been before. I was never a runner and now I am. That makes me feel fabulous.
But reflecting on the 100 pounds lost yet only being a pound lighter than my lightest adult weight… It means I was a failure in the past. I let myself gain those 99 pounds. I treated my body terribly. I hurt myself and now I am making reparations.
Yes, I could say that “hey at least I caught it and am doing something about it” but in all honesty I feel like that’s a cop-out right now. I am instead choosing to use this time to reflect on the why and the how. Not why and how I lost the weight but on the gains. I think it is important to reflect on the reasons I gained so that I don’t repeat my mistakes.
So while I am happy to have finally hit this milestone and I don’t want to dwell on the negative, I am holding off on celebrating. I am realistically approaching the accomplishment. I still have many pounds to lose until I am at a healthy weight. The reparations are being made and the real journey is just beginning.
Raspberry Fudge HMR Diet Muffins
These are super easy to make and have traveled in my purse to many end of the school year social events! Baking time may vary depending on your oven.
Raspberry Fudge Mini Muffins
1 HMR Oatmeal
1 HMR Chocolate 70 shake mix
1 tbsp unsweetened cocoa (I prefer Ghirardelli)
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 cup sugar-free raspberry syrup (Torani or DaVinci work)
1/2 cup of water
1/4 cup of water (reserved)
Preheat over to 375 and spray cooking spray in mini muffin tin.
Mix oatmeal, 1/2 cup of water, and raspberry syrup. Microwave for 90 seconds.
Add cocoa, baking powder, shake mix, and reserved 1/4 cup of water to the oatmeal mix. Be careful not to over mix as you will lose the air bubbles that make the muffins fluffy.
Distribute into 12 mini muffin rounds. Bake for 20-25 minutes until muffins are firm when lightly pressed down on. Remove from oven and then from pan to prevent over-cooking and collapse.
Makes three servings of four mini muffins.
Vanilla Rose Peach HMR Shake Recipe
Our health class this week was a party! No, it wasn’t just a fun class but an actual party. To be more specific, it was a condiment potluck where we all brought some of our favorite condiments to share with our classmates. I swapped some condiments as well as went out and bought some new ones — feeling totally inspired!
And just in time for a really hot weekend!
This shake uses rose water which adds floral notes and a level of complexity to the shake that I can’t explain but it really does elevate the meal. Play around with the amount you use as I tend to enjoy strong flavors but rose water, like the lavender extract, can be overpowering. So if you like more subtle flavors, start with half the rose water.
Vanilla Rose Peach Shake
1 HMR 800 Vanilla
2 ounces Torani SF Peach syrup
2 tbsp rose water
1 cup water
8 ice cubes
Blend liquids and shake mix together. Add ice and blend until smooth and fluffy.
Chocolate Lavender Shake with Sea Salt
I have always enjoyed unique flavor combinations as well as mixing sweet and salty flavors. When brainstorming new ways to mix up my HMR diet shakes, I started to reflect on gourmet chocolates I had enjoyed prior to starting the diet. This smooth floral shake has complexity and yet still offers all the benefits of an HMR meal. I let my Vitamix run extra long to make the shake extra fluffy!
Chocolate Lavender Shake with Sea Salt
One packet of HMR 800 Chocolate
1.5 cups of water
8 ice cubes
1/2 tsp food grade lavender extract
Flake salt
Blend shake, water and extract together. Add ice cubes and blend until fluffy. Pour into glass and sprinkle with flake salt.
Black Forest Mocha Shake
Our homework assignment for my Phase One class last week was to try a new cold shake. The purpose was to get us out of our comfort zone as well as bring in new ideas for summer. I was inspired by one of my classmates when she shared her creation during class and made some modifications yesterday and then again today to create my own version.
I have been participating in the Runner’s World #RWRunStreak which started Memorial Day and ends on the Fourth of July. The challenge is to get out and run at least one mile a day and while I am still a relatively slow short-distance runner, this seemed doable and so I have made it my goal to complete this each morning and I end each run at Starbucks where I pick up a tall black drip coffee. I then walk back to my home and throw that hot coffee into the freezer to cool while I shower and get ready for the day – c’mon the iced coffee costs almost 50 cents more for the same thing!!!
Black Forest Mocha: An HMR Shake Recipe
1 HMR 800
1 Tall Black Coffee from Starbucks (I *think* that’s 12 ounces?)
6 pumps Torani SF Black Cherry Syrup
1/2 TBSP Ghirardelli Unsweetened Cocoa (it’s my favorite)
8 ice cubes
Blend liquids and powders together. Add ice and blend to desired consistency.
My shake is not super sweet. You could add zero calorie sweetener if you like but I like the bitterness of the cocoa and coffee. My classmate used SF chocolate syrup instead of cocoa powder which may also sweeten it up.
This will definitely be a standard in my summer rotation!
A review of the HMR Diet: Six Months Decision Free and #HMRStrong
If someone had told me seven months ago that I would be eating prepackaged entress and shake packets as my sole form of food, I would have laughed you out of the room.
If someone had told me seven months ago that I would be running a sub-10:00 mile and swimming a mile, I would have looked at you like it was a pipe dream. “Someday… maybe….” But my heart would ache because I would doubt that I had the ability to ever pull it out.
If someone had told me seven months ago that I would be down almost 90 lbs after six months, I would have asked what limbs would I be losing in the process.
I was recently asked why I decided to take a drastic move in my life starting HMR and all of my physical training. Why now? What prompted this move?
If you have known me for years then you will know that I have had a series of struggles with my health. I gained a significant amount of weight right out of high school. I continued to put on weight when I started teaching and commuting 90+ minutes each way to work. I then lost some of that weight in 2006 counting points but some significant events in my life brought back the stress eating and the pounds. I attempted to learn to run in 2009 and lost a bit of weight but improper training and an injury uncovered bigger health issues. All the while I half-assed various diets in an attempt to both control my health but also my weight. Finally, I gave up on all of it and just “enjoyed life” while the pounds piled on.
This past summer we took a cross-country road trip. And roadside hikes that should have been easy were extremely difficult. We went to Hawaii and I felt limited in everything I attempted. I was constantly out of air. I got tired easily. I didn’t find physical activity pleasurable because I wasn’t fit and was carrying so much extra weight. Multiple people in my life passed away in the months leading up to my starting HMR and many were due to weight related health issues. I had trouble sleeping at night worrying that every ache and pain was a sign I was next.
A friend had recently gotten weight loss surgery and I was seriously contemplating it after hearing about her experience. However I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it until the summer at the earliest and we were just a couple months into the school year. So I went to my medical group’s Web site and looked at what programs they were offering to help. I saw orientations for HMR and thought “well it couldn’t hurt to check it out?”
At the time I was opposed to processed food. I wanted to lose weight on my own. I wanted to do it naturally. I was judgey-mcjudergerson about everything I thought HMR stood for. I thought “well even if I lose any weight I won’t learn how to keep it off and it will come right back on.” I had tried Jenny Craig and Nutrisystem so I was *obviously* an expert about meal replacement diets… Ha!
However I forced myself to enter the medical offices with an open mind. After all, I had kind of sucked at doing it on my own. Despite years of weight loss meetings and web sites and books and talks, I was at my heaviest weight ever. I ate more veggies than most people I knew but along with that ate and drank super high calorie foods and considered 20 minutes on the elliptical as an intense workout. In other words, I knew I needed help and I wasn’t afraid to ask for it.
At that orientation meeting, I began to understand that the HMR Diet would be a major overhaul to my social lifestyle. No alcohol? No outside foods? A WEEKLY meeting? I work over 80 hours some weeks… where was I going to fit all of this in?
But something inside of me said that I could do it. That my life depended on it.
So I drove straight from the orientation to speak to my doctor. She said I should try it. She had been an HMR doctor at a previous practice. She thought it would be harder than surgery but it would be good to do it, even as a precursor to surgery, to learn healthier habits. And so I went in for all the lab work.
As a high school student, I didn’t follow good study habits. However as a high school teacher I have learned a few things about setting myself up for success. And so I spent the couple of weeks between orientation and the first night of class preparing my environment, talking to those closest to me, and mentally preparing myself. Confession: I also had a number of “last meals” where I ate whatever I wanted and committed those tastes and textures to memory. I will write more about preparing to begin in a future post but the process itself really set me up for a successful journey.
I have social anxiety. I get nervous in new situations and meeting new people. But luckily I have an amazing health educator, a fabulous clinic full of super positive staff, and a class that had some really nice and positive people in it to provide a safe and supportive environment. The clinic is my safe haven. The first couple months I would show up an hour early sometimes to protect myself from wandering off to a drive-thru because I didn’t know how to spend that hour. I cannot stress how that support helped me get through some tough time. When I felt judgement from others for taking on this diet, I knew I had a judgement free zone.
Judgement is a big thing on this diet. Because you isolate yourself from outside foods, people feel like they can make all sorts of snide and snarky comments to you. I am not open about being on this diet, both because I don’t want my diet to define me, but also because I want to spare myself the nasty comments. If someone asks and seems interested, I will tell them about it. But unlike previous diets where I would declare to everyone what I was doing, I started this one quietly and have remained relatively quiet about it. However through my health classes I have learned how to empower myself and to deal with some of the comments. I know I will have more to face along the journey, but I am building a toolbox of responses.
Cost is the other big hang up for many people on this diet. Yes, the medical tests and supervision is pricey and yes the shakes and entrees cost money. The gym, training sessions, new clothes all cost money as well. You know what else costs money? All the bad food I was eating. All the medical bills I paid. All the unproductive hours where I couldn’t focus and didn’t get things done that needed to be finished. And losing my life day by day to my obesity was the most expensive part of my life. So yes I have depleted some of my savings but I also know I am saving money in the long run. I also know that the improved quality of life is worth the investment. And honestly, I just cut out a bunch of crap I had been wasting it on. Even at happy hour prices those beer and french fry orders add up!
Over the last six months I have been on the road more than half the weekends. I have attended galas and other social events. I have run multiple races. Attended family events. Tried a variety of fitness opportunities. Struggled through exhaustion and stress. Celebrated life and mourned loss. In other words, I have lived. And I have lived “in the box.”
I will be honest. It has not always been easy. And it is getting harder. Because as I see results and feel stronger, I question why I am still in the box. I miss outside food. I feel like I can take a cheat meal… But I won’t. As long as I stay in the box, I am working towards my final goal. This time is truly different and I don’t want to give myself an excuse to halt the journey before I finish it.
I am on a lifelong journey of living the best possible life I can. I believe in myself and my inner strength. And while life happens, I am building skills to pursue health and happiness in spite of life obstacles. It takes dedication and a sense of purpose. But it also takes faith in whatever diet program you choose to pursue. The HMR Diet does work, if you put in the work. I am #HMRStrong.
HMR Diet: Spiced Rum Muffins Recipe
As I have worked to increase my physical activity, I have found myself needing to fuel on-the-go. This combined with the travel demands of the job have left me playing with ways to increase the portability of the HMR shakes and cereals. This is one of my go-to recipes. It’s important to remember that these would be a low volume food — I make sure to have at least 8 ounces of water with each serving in order to help with the volume of the meal.
Spiced Rum Muffins
3 HMR Oatmeal packets
3 HMR 70 shakes – vanilla
1/4 cup DaVinci Sugar-Free Chai syrup
1/2 cup DaVinci Sugar-Free Butter Rum syrup
1 and 1/2 cups water
2 tsp baking power
Preheat oven or toaster oven to 350 degrees. Use nonstick cooking spray quickly over mini muffin tins (I find the silicone mini muffin tins to be the easiest).
Begin by mixing the oatmeal, syrups and water in a large microwave safe bowl. Heat for two minutes. Stir and let cool for about five minutes. At this point the oatmeal will have cooked and soaked up much of the liquid but will still be warm. Add the shakes and baking powder by folding them in. The heat from the oatmeal will begin to activate the rising agents and over stirring will deflate the batter. You want those air bubbles being created in order to have fluffier muffins!
Gently spoon batter into muffin tins. Bake for 20-30 minutes depending on your oven calibration – you want a nice brown color on top and a slight firmness to the muffin when you gently touch the top. After removing the pan from the oven, you will want to work to release the muffins from the pan relatively soon after baking or you risk the temperature issues between the heat of the pan and the cool air above causing the muffins to collapse. I like to use a butter knife if I have trouble just popping them out and then I put them on a rack to cool.
After muffins have cooled, I divide the muffins into 9 equal servings. Depending on which pan I use, I either get three or four mini-muffins per serving. I am on HMR Decision Free 3/2 with the 180 shakes, so 1/9 of this recipe counts as half of a shake for me (1/9 of the recipe is like a half an oatmeal or one 70 shake calorically). I then put the servings into snack bags and put them in either the fridge or freezer depending on when I plan on consuming them.
Compliments and the Weight Loss Journey
Weight loss is an incredibly difficult journey. Limiting food. Working out. Avoiding temptations in the Gap. It is a daily struggle regardless of what diet you are on. And at some point, you have that moment where you wonder if it is even worth continuing the struggle.
Enter the compliment.
Starting about 6 weeks into the start of the HMR program, I began to have people notice that I looked different. And at three months, people didn’t hold back their observations.
“Wow you look great!”
“What have you been doing?”
“You are disappearing!”
“Be honest, how many pounds have you lost?”
I have been wanting to write this post for awhile and the topic just keeps growing. I could probably write a book at this point. But I wanted to limit it today to look at some of the positive and negative effects of receiving compliments along the weight loss journey.
There are negatives?
Quite a bit actually. I have been struggling for months holding back responses to some of the compliments I have received both because I struggle to accept praise but also because some are just thoughtless. For example, a coworker who you aren’t close to walks up and says “Wow! How much weight have you lost this week?” It catches you off-guard. It defines your interaction by asking for a number. It treats you not as a person worthy of talking to but rather a “let’s get to the point, you look better and I want to know how much better you look now by placing a number on it.”
Asking someone who has lost weight “how much” is asking them to quantify a struggle into something we are told shouldn’t be our driving force. Week after week I get on a scale and sometimes I get a big decrease numerically and some weeks it’s barely a blip. Asking me in a week where I worked out hours every day, followed the diet to the letter, and the scale doesn’t respond is absolutely discouraging. Because you stole my other accomplishments away from me. I felt like a rockstar, and now I *only* lost a pound.
Additionally, why am I now getting your attention? The number of “good for you” type compliments I have gotten have gotten to the point where I asked my husband outright “do they know how condescending they sound?” He explained that most people don’t know what to say, and many aren’t able to take on the challenge themselves. They think it’s complimentary but the compliments come out sounding backhanded like I am a good puppy who is following orders and it’s about damn time I took care of myself. Because all of those previous times I struggled and was less successful weren’t worthy of the acknowledgement but this time I deserve praise. “Good for you girl. Sit. Drink a shake.”
It’s hard for people to respond to big changes involving sensitive subjects like weight loss. I completely understand. And in many instances, compliments are big motivators! But don’t come up and pinch me and tell me how skinny I am getting (yup that’s happened) and stop trying to quantify my accomplishments. I will tell you my personal number if I feel like we are in a place where I can share.
This weekend was a tipping point for me with regards to compliments. I am at an event where I am seeing people who I haven’t seen for a couple of months or more. So I spent the week mentally preparing for reaction. I got my hair done as a reward for hitting 75 pounds (to be more specific, that’s 76 pounds lost since November 13), I brought some of my new clothes that I feel comfortable in, and I mentally talked myself through how to accept compliments, no matter what form, with grace.
This weekend is also a struggle because of the delicious foods and lack of time for physical activity. Tournaments are like that. Super intense. Lots of responsibility. Constantly on the go. And they keep you going by fueling with high calorie tempting goodness.
A positive of the compliments is that it keeps me motivated to stay on plan. In the past, when I started getting compliments, I would get complacent. I would slack on “the diet” because I was “looking good” so it didn’t matter anymore. However on HMR it’s different. Still on the Decision Free diet, I would have to completely derail and go out of “the box” to slack. And knowing how far I have come and how far I have to go, I don’t want to slack. So reframing the compliments as motivation to continue has helped me stay in the box and avoid temptation. As I learn to accept the positive motivation behind the compliments and ignore the pinching and quantification, I can channel the encouragement behind the comments and use that positive energy.
I am #HMRStrong and I can do this. I appreciate your compliments but I also know that success doesn’t rest on your feedback. It requires my internal motivation. But I accept your positive energy and I will continue to learn to reframe those who may mean well but may lack an understanding of my struggle.
“Thank you. I have been working hard. I am healthier.”
Savory HMR Mustard Chicken
Walking through Whole Foods today I was hit by a delicious smell. Suddenly I wanted whatever that delicious smell was. However, now that I am on the HMR Decision Free diet, that wasn’t an option. So instead I decided to dissect the smells and see if I could make an “In the Box” option.
I have no idea what the actual dish I smelled was but the underlying scents were vinegar and mustard. Thus, this dish was born!
Warning: if you don’t like vinegar or mustard, this probably isn’t your cup of tea.
Mustard Chicken and Rice
HMR Savory Chicken Entree
1 tbsp German mustard (or your favorite spicy mustard that meets HMR guidelines)
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1/2 tbsp capers, drained
1/8 tsp smoked paprika
1/8 tsp smoked salt
1/8 tsp ground pepper
1/8 tsp flake salt
Heat savory chicken in microwave.
Whisk all other ingredients together.
Plate entree with rice on the bottom of the bowl topped with the mushrooms and carrots and finally the chicken. Pour sauce over chicken and enjoy.
Thai Steak & Potatoes – HMR Style!
One of the women in my HMR classes have been making a version of this for months (you can find her version here) and I have been using her recipe as a base to create my own version. I make the sauce in single servings ahead of time and keep them in the fridge. You can toss an entree in the microwave and then add the sauce but if I have the time and patience, I like to throw the entree in a saucepan and cook it low and slow with the sauce for a deeper flavor.
I make this with the HMR Steak & Potatoes entree but I bet it would be good with a few others!
HMR Decision Free Thai Peanut Sauce
1 tbsp PB2
1 tbsp low-sodium soy sauce
1 tbsp rice vinegar
1 tsp powdered garlic
1/2 tsp powdered ginger
1/4 tsp imitation coconut extract
Whisk together and let sit for the flavors to meld.
The Healthy Academic 