San Jose Giants 5k “Giant Race” Recap
I have enjoyed reading so many race reviews/recaps that I thought it might be cool to start documenting some of my own races. It’s a great way for me to remember my experiences from some of my favorite races!
The San Jose Giants 5k on June 28, 2014 was part of “The Giant Race” series which starts with a race at Spring Training in Arizona in March and will end with a 5k/10k/half marathon in San Francisco in September. I completed the San Francisco Giants Plat to Plate 5k in 2009 and had a blast running with fellow baseball fans so I knew I needed to do this race again. Then I learned if I ran in San Jose as well, I could earn special ear buds and another race was registered for!
Packet pick-up on Friday night was incredibly easy. I got my bib, shirt, and included ticket to the game on Saturday night after the race. I had picked up a couple of extra tickets for $5 a piece for my husband and parents. I was also talked into buying two special Bondi Band headbands with an adjustable strap in the back. I told the guy at the table that headbands always fall off my head and he told me if it fell off during the race he would give me back my money. I’m always up for a challenge! (Spoiler: It stayed on for the WHOLE RACE and didn’t even slip!)
Awww I wanted to be in Buster’s group! Gotta get faster!
I woke up with anticipation and rushed to get ready on race morning. While I had completed several races prior, this was my first officially timed 5k since starting my HMR weight loss journey and I was both excited and scared about how I would fare.
Parking was super easy (probably because I got there over an hour before the start!) and so I used the time to warm up and make multiple trips to the porta potties (I was nervous!). Then I checked out the starting line which was set up with three self-monitored pacing areas.
Running with Romo!
I knew I didn’t belong in the Sub-8 area although I do love Mr. Posey! Someone might have wanted to be clearer in oral instructions though because many walking Posey fans who were new to 5ks joined this area near the start which did lead to some clogging of the course at the beginning!
I put myself in the Romo Runners group because I knew my easy training runs were between 10 and 11 minutes for the most part and that I planned on picking up the pace. However I stayed to the side just in case I had seeded myself wrong.
Part of my pre-planned race attire was a tutu from Glam Runners. I was inspired by the causes they raise money for and although I felt silly putting it on, it also felt kind of cool. Not to mention the orange and black just scream Giants Pride! I got lots of compliments along the course and also motivated another runner as I heard the comment right behind me “gotta beat the tutu” (they didn’t but hey if it keeps you moving!).
The course itself was great – we went around the neighborhood near the ballpark as well as through part of Happy Hollow park. The 5-miler got to explore more of the park – maybe I will try that one next year? I had never been in Happy Hollow and it was a bit difficult with some cobblestone and grass running in addition to the paved path but the coverage of the trees was a welcome break from the sun!
I was aiming to finish in under 35 minutes which allowed me to fade. I was secretly hoping to break 32 minutes which my trainer told me I could manage but I didn’t want to get my hopes up. After the first mile pace time was announced in my ear (using the MapMyFitness app), I thought I had gone out too fast! The voice said my first mile was completed in 8:54! So I forced myself to slow down – worried I would burn out before I finished. I slowed to what I thought was my normal training pace but at mile two the voice said I had completed a 9:34 mile. I did some quick math and realized if I picked it back up, I could potentially break the magical 30 minute barrier that I thought was impossible.
The race ended on the baseball field which was incredibly cool. As I finished a 9:20 third mile, I realized I would be cutting it close. It was difficult to re-motivate my legs which had enjoyed slowing down but I pushed hard during that last tenth of a mile. As I rounded the outside of the park, I pumped my legs, racing through the parking lot and onto the field. Forgetting about the difference between chip and gun time, all I saw was the clock counting down at the finish and knowing I had less than 20 seconds to make it over that finish line to get an under 30 finish. That last stretch was an 8:52 pace and I did it!
The gun time was 29:52 but the actual chip time was 29:23 which was than I ever imagined I could complete a race. Some people may dismiss my 9:18/9:28 average pace (per GPS/per race results – pace changed based .07 mile difference extra distance dodging walkers) however I am still, weeks later, fully acknowledging how far I have come. And knowing I slowed down in mile two gives me extra motivation in upcoming 5ks to see how much more speed I can bring!
I am definitely doing this race again next year. Even if I can’t pose with the WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONSHIP TROPHIES again, it was a fabulous local race capped off with an evening of baseball and family time. Can’t ask for a better day!
All decked out in Orange & Black at the starting line!
Disney World Decision Free: Vacationing on the HMR Diet
During my 34 weeks on the HMR Decision Free diet, I have traveled more than the average American. And while some of it has been for fun, the majority has been work related and thus relatively regimented. So when I decided to visit my sister for a week in Florida and we decided to spend three of those days in the land of Disney, I got a little anxious about staying in the box.
First, a spoiler, I survived! However I thought it would be helpful to write about my experience for others and also as a reminder to myself for future trips.
According to the WDW Web site:
“Guests with food allergies or intolerances are allowed to bring food into Walt Disney World theme parks and dining locations. When entering a park, simply inform the Security at bag check that someone in the party has a food allergy or intolerance.
Refrigerating and Heating Personal Food Items
Guests staying at a Disney Resort hotel who have items that need to be refrigerated should ask the Front Desk to have a refrigerator placed in the room, subject to availability. An additional charge may apply.Please note that Cast Members are prohibited from storing, preparing, cooking or reheating any food brought into our Resorts or theme parks by Guests.”
I had no issues with Security and didn’t even need to inform them about the food I was bringing in, they must see a lot of things come through.
Before we left, I baked both savory and sweet HMR mini muffins using the oatmeals, soups and 70 shakes. You can find some of my recipes here. I portioned them out into individual servings that were equivalent of a half a shake for me and a full shake for my Healthy Solutions at Home sister.
I also packed a shaker bottle with two 800 shakes, a 70 shake, and a Benefit Bar. As pictured here:
We also each packed an entree that could be enjoyed cold (Five Bean casserole!), several types of sugar free gum, and a sandwich baggie full of various water flavor squeeze-ins like Crystal Light Liquid (mmmm Sangria and Strawberry Lemonade!) and Dasani Drops (Cherry Pomegranate FTW). The gum and water flavorings allowed us to change up flavors we were experiencing without increasing our caloric intake.
Next, we each packed an empty water bottle to refill throughout the park. We quickly learned you could walk up to vendors who had fountain drink machines and request cups of ice water for free! We would fill up our water bottles with refreshing cold water and play with flavorings. We also purchased various diet sodas and unsweetened iced teas when we wanted a special treat.
The secrets for me were front-loading and keeping myself occupied. I ate an entree before we left in the morning and drank a giant bottle of water. Then I made sure to always have a low calorie beverage in my hand (yay iced water!) so that I could drink whenever I was tempted with food. And I won’t lie… I was tempted! I never craved a turkey leg before (I have never had one) and it was all I could think about for an hour or so after walking past a booth selling them. But we moved away from that part of the park, I enjoyed a couple of flavored waters and bites of a benefit bar, and I stayed in the box.
I think it is easy to give up your diet when you are on vacation. Your schedule is switched up and you are relaxing. You can justify things because you “deserve” them or it’s a special treat. But what I asked myself was if I were never going to return to Disney World, could I live without ever trying X or Y? And the answer I figured out was that I would be fine.
And I am planning my return. My sister and I are all signed up for the Disney Princess Half Marathon in February! So if that turkey leg still sounds good after running 13.1 miles, I may let myself have a bite. But I will be in control of the food rather than allowing it to control me. I will plan for the food. I will also be in a place by then where I have not only transitioned into Phase Two but I will have lived in Phase Two for several months.
I am proud of my success of staying in the box but I also realize my vacation wasn’t ruined by not eating Gap foods. I didn’t need a turkey leg or margarita or mouse-shaped pretzel to complete my experience. This realization has helped me further separate food from my day to day life. Food is fuel and it can be a delicious experience but it is not the whole experience.
Now to remember this all as I head into two weeks of travel into major “foodie” cities like New Orleans!
Curried Mustard HMR Bean Cakes
After spending months of eating cold HMR Five Bean Casserole at debate tournaments, I was determined to find a new way to enjoy it. I have been playing with this recipe for almost two months trying to find a balance of flavors and while these pack a flavorful punch, I am sure there are still ways to play with it even more. This is the entree of the month at my clinic and I am traveling a fair amount in July, so I will continue to tweak it and will add modification suggestions if any turn out. I have also frozen two batches for upcoming trips, so I will also post how it travels.
I have made these to enjoy at parties and on road trips. They are great warm and cold!
Curried Mustard HMR Bean Cakes
- 1 HMR Five-Bean Casserole
- 1 HMR Oatmeal
- 1/2 cup of water
- 2 tsp dried minced onion
- 1 tsp yellow mustard
- 1/2 tsp curry powder
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 1/4 tsp garlic powder
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Prepare baking sheet with a silpat/silicone baking mat lightly sprayed with cooking spray. I use a small baking ring to form my cakes and I also lightly spray the inside of the ring with cooking spray.
Mix all ingredients *except* the casserole in a microwave-safe bowl and microwave for 90 seconds. Add in casserole and mix well.
Spoon mixture into ring molds or make small mounds on your cooking sheet. If using ring mold, press down lightly to pack the mixture together before gently lifting the ring mold.
Bake for 25-35 minutes depending on your oven. You want the cake to be relatively firm. You do not need to flip over the cakes, however it is optional after 25 or 30 minutes depending on the thickness of the cake if you want it browned on both sides. The cakes pictured were not flipped over during the baking process.
This recipe made about 8 cakes. On my prescription it is a shake and an entree. Please remember this is a low-volume preparation for the shake, so drink lots of fluid to help with the volume/fullness!
How to lose weight the easy way…
Cut off an arm!
But on a serious note, I have recently learned from friends that a few acquaintances have been overheard saying I am losing weight “the easy way” and my only wish is that I had heard them say it.
I am not big on confrontation, but I do think this is an issue that needs confronting. There is not an “easy” way to lose weight and I am so sick of all of the judgement that exists about various diet and health choices. From the stigma of weight loss surgery to the negative attitudes about meal replacements, I just don’t understand why people feel they have the right to label one method or another “easy.”
I have been on the HMR Diet for 227 days. That is 227 days where I have had to say no to all the delicious food out there in the world. It’s 227 days of eating the same general meals. It’s 227 days of dragging my butt to do some sort of exercise. It’s 227 days of mental and physical battles.
And yes, I have lost over 100 pounds in those 227 days. And yes, that seems fast. But to me those 227 days seem like years and years of struggling.
In truth, it has been years of struggle. My first attempt at a diet was in high school when I went with my mother to a Weight Watchers meeting. And I have been dieting in some form ever since.
I know how hard it is to count calories, points, carbs, vegetables, meal replacements, cups of juice, glasses of water, grams of protein and more. None of it is easy.
The difference this time is that I have found success because I have found something I can manage. Which makes it look easy.
However, I still have to fight to get every pound off. I have to take notes and learn in every health class so I can continue to form habits to keep the weight off once it is gone. I will have to continue my health education when I begin the long process of transitioning from Phase One Decision Free to Healthy Solutions and eventually to Phase Two. It is a long and time consuming process but it is what I need to do to be successful.
Ultimately when I hear someone say someone took the “easy way out” to lose weight, what I hear is jealousy. It is the same jealousy I could hear coming from my mouth years ago when I watched someone else be successful in their weight loss journey taking a different route than the diet I had prescribed myself to. I wasn’t successful. She was. Clearly her path was easier.
I was wrong about her path. And if you think my path has been easy, you are also wrong.
It sure as hell hasn’t been easy. But it does work for me. And I am healthier because of it. You are welcome to join me.
Vanilla Scented S’mores Shake
Reflecting on summer evenings with friends pre-HMR takes me to making s’mores with homemade vanilla marshmallows. The rich sweet flavors were what I attempted to recreate with this shake and it didn’t disappoint. I hear there is a sugar free toasted marshmallow syrup that exists but I haven’t seen it yet to try out.
1 HMR Chocolate 800 packet
2 ounces Torani SF S’Mores syrup
1 tsp Vanilla extract
1 cup of water
8 ice cubes
Blend all ingredients except ice together to mix. Add ice and blend until fluffy. Enjoy!
I bet this would also make a delicious hot beverage – it’s on my list of drinks to try!
Salted Lavender-Vanilla Chocolate Truffle Pudding
This week’s HMR meal replacement homework was to try the pudding in a new way. I have made lots of puddings over my weeks on the diet so trying a new way seemed like a challenge.
This afternoon I met friends at the San Francisco Ferry Building. A total foodie haven! When we wandered by a gourmet chocolate shop, I was inspired to take an earlier shake recipe and modify it a bit to turn it into a rich pudding.
Be warned that lavender extract is VERY strong and the amount I use may be too much for most people. If you are new to using lavender oil, try using just a drop or two.
Salted Lavender-Vanilla Chocolate Truffle Pudding
1 HMR 70 Chocolate Shake Packet
1/8 tsp Lavender Extract (or less!)
1/4 tsp Vanilla Extract
1 tsp Unsweetened Cocoa
2 ounces Water
1-2 pinches Flake Salt
Mix all ingredients except salt together until creamy (I use a tiny whisk but a spoon should also work). Sprinkle salt on top.
100 pounds lost. A reflection.
This week I officially hit the 100 pound weight loss club. Spoiler alert: It’s not an actual club. No clubhouse and no secret handshake. At least not that I am yet aware of.
As friends have learned about my accomplishment, I have had a couple ask me how it feels to have lost 100 pounds. And I don’t really know how to answer.
I want to say it feels fabulous. I want to tell them how awesome I feel. I want to extrapolate on the health benefits I am seeing both physically and mentally.
But I am hung up on something bigger.
I let myself get to the point where I needed to lose over 100 pounds.
In this truth lies the complexity of the triumph.
I started running while on this weight-loss journey. I have run several races and have signed up for many more. Every race so far I have had a faster time than the previous race. I want to shout my PRs from the roof top. I earned those. I am taking myself to new places I have never been before. I was never a runner and now I am. That makes me feel fabulous.
But reflecting on the 100 pounds lost yet only being a pound lighter than my lightest adult weight… It means I was a failure in the past. I let myself gain those 99 pounds. I treated my body terribly. I hurt myself and now I am making reparations.
Yes, I could say that “hey at least I caught it and am doing something about it” but in all honesty I feel like that’s a cop-out right now. I am instead choosing to use this time to reflect on the why and the how. Not why and how I lost the weight but on the gains. I think it is important to reflect on the reasons I gained so that I don’t repeat my mistakes.
So while I am happy to have finally hit this milestone and I don’t want to dwell on the negative, I am holding off on celebrating. I am realistically approaching the accomplishment. I still have many pounds to lose until I am at a healthy weight. The reparations are being made and the real journey is just beginning.
Raspberry Fudge HMR Diet Muffins
These are super easy to make and have traveled in my purse to many end of the school year social events! Baking time may vary depending on your oven.
Raspberry Fudge Mini Muffins
1 HMR Oatmeal
1 HMR Chocolate 70 shake mix
1 tbsp unsweetened cocoa (I prefer Ghirardelli)
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 cup sugar-free raspberry syrup (Torani or DaVinci work)
1/2 cup of water
1/4 cup of water (reserved)
Preheat over to 375 and spray cooking spray in mini muffin tin.
Mix oatmeal, 1/2 cup of water, and raspberry syrup. Microwave for 90 seconds.
Add cocoa, baking powder, shake mix, and reserved 1/4 cup of water to the oatmeal mix. Be careful not to over mix as you will lose the air bubbles that make the muffins fluffy.
Distribute into 12 mini muffin rounds. Bake for 20-25 minutes until muffins are firm when lightly pressed down on. Remove from oven and then from pan to prevent over-cooking and collapse.
Makes three servings of four mini muffins.
Vanilla Rose Peach HMR Shake Recipe
Our health class this week was a party! No, it wasn’t just a fun class but an actual party. To be more specific, it was a condiment potluck where we all brought some of our favorite condiments to share with our classmates. I swapped some condiments as well as went out and bought some new ones — feeling totally inspired!
And just in time for a really hot weekend!
This shake uses rose water which adds floral notes and a level of complexity to the shake that I can’t explain but it really does elevate the meal. Play around with the amount you use as I tend to enjoy strong flavors but rose water, like the lavender extract, can be overpowering. So if you like more subtle flavors, start with half the rose water.
Vanilla Rose Peach Shake
1 HMR 800 Vanilla
2 ounces Torani SF Peach syrup
2 tbsp rose water
1 cup water
8 ice cubes
Blend liquids and shake mix together. Add ice and blend until smooth and fluffy.
Chocolate Lavender Shake with Sea Salt
I have always enjoyed unique flavor combinations as well as mixing sweet and salty flavors. When brainstorming new ways to mix up my HMR diet shakes, I started to reflect on gourmet chocolates I had enjoyed prior to starting the diet. This smooth floral shake has complexity and yet still offers all the benefits of an HMR meal. I let my Vitamix run extra long to make the shake extra fluffy!
Chocolate Lavender Shake with Sea Salt
One packet of HMR 800 Chocolate
1.5 cups of water
8 ice cubes
1/2 tsp food grade lavender extract
Flake salt
Blend shake, water and extract together. Add ice cubes and blend until fluffy. Pour into glass and sprinkle with flake salt.
Black Forest Mocha Shake
Our homework assignment for my Phase One class last week was to try a new cold shake. The purpose was to get us out of our comfort zone as well as bring in new ideas for summer. I was inspired by one of my classmates when she shared her creation during class and made some modifications yesterday and then again today to create my own version.
I have been participating in the Runner’s World #RWRunStreak which started Memorial Day and ends on the Fourth of July. The challenge is to get out and run at least one mile a day and while I am still a relatively slow short-distance runner, this seemed doable and so I have made it my goal to complete this each morning and I end each run at Starbucks where I pick up a tall black drip coffee. I then walk back to my home and throw that hot coffee into the freezer to cool while I shower and get ready for the day – c’mon the iced coffee costs almost 50 cents more for the same thing!!!
Black Forest Mocha: An HMR Shake Recipe
1 HMR 800
1 Tall Black Coffee from Starbucks (I *think* that’s 12 ounces?)
6 pumps Torani SF Black Cherry Syrup
1/2 TBSP Ghirardelli Unsweetened Cocoa (it’s my favorite)
8 ice cubes
Blend liquids and powders together. Add ice and blend to desired consistency.
My shake is not super sweet. You could add zero calorie sweetener if you like but I like the bitterness of the cocoa and coffee. My classmate used SF chocolate syrup instead of cocoa powder which may also sweeten it up.
This will definitely be a standard in my summer rotation!
A review of the HMR Diet: Six Months Decision Free and #HMRStrong
If someone had told me seven months ago that I would be eating prepackaged entress and shake packets as my sole form of food, I would have laughed you out of the room.
If someone had told me seven months ago that I would be running a sub-10:00 mile and swimming a mile, I would have looked at you like it was a pipe dream. “Someday… maybe….” But my heart would ache because I would doubt that I had the ability to ever pull it out.
If someone had told me seven months ago that I would be down almost 90 lbs after six months, I would have asked what limbs would I be losing in the process.
I was recently asked why I decided to take a drastic move in my life starting HMR and all of my physical training. Why now? What prompted this move?
If you have known me for years then you will know that I have had a series of struggles with my health. I gained a significant amount of weight right out of high school. I continued to put on weight when I started teaching and commuting 90+ minutes each way to work. I then lost some of that weight in 2006 counting points but some significant events in my life brought back the stress eating and the pounds. I attempted to learn to run in 2009 and lost a bit of weight but improper training and an injury uncovered bigger health issues. All the while I half-assed various diets in an attempt to both control my health but also my weight. Finally, I gave up on all of it and just “enjoyed life” while the pounds piled on.
This past summer we took a cross-country road trip. And roadside hikes that should have been easy were extremely difficult. We went to Hawaii and I felt limited in everything I attempted. I was constantly out of air. I got tired easily. I didn’t find physical activity pleasurable because I wasn’t fit and was carrying so much extra weight. Multiple people in my life passed away in the months leading up to my starting HMR and many were due to weight related health issues. I had trouble sleeping at night worrying that every ache and pain was a sign I was next.
A friend had recently gotten weight loss surgery and I was seriously contemplating it after hearing about her experience. However I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it until the summer at the earliest and we were just a couple months into the school year. So I went to my medical group’s Web site and looked at what programs they were offering to help. I saw orientations for HMR and thought “well it couldn’t hurt to check it out?”
At the time I was opposed to processed food. I wanted to lose weight on my own. I wanted to do it naturally. I was judgey-mcjudergerson about everything I thought HMR stood for. I thought “well even if I lose any weight I won’t learn how to keep it off and it will come right back on.” I had tried Jenny Craig and Nutrisystem so I was *obviously* an expert about meal replacement diets… Ha!
However I forced myself to enter the medical offices with an open mind. After all, I had kind of sucked at doing it on my own. Despite years of weight loss meetings and web sites and books and talks, I was at my heaviest weight ever. I ate more veggies than most people I knew but along with that ate and drank super high calorie foods and considered 20 minutes on the elliptical as an intense workout. In other words, I knew I needed help and I wasn’t afraid to ask for it.
At that orientation meeting, I began to understand that the HMR Diet would be a major overhaul to my social lifestyle. No alcohol? No outside foods? A WEEKLY meeting? I work over 80 hours some weeks… where was I going to fit all of this in?
But something inside of me said that I could do it. That my life depended on it.
So I drove straight from the orientation to speak to my doctor. She said I should try it. She had been an HMR doctor at a previous practice. She thought it would be harder than surgery but it would be good to do it, even as a precursor to surgery, to learn healthier habits. And so I went in for all the lab work.
As a high school student, I didn’t follow good study habits. However as a high school teacher I have learned a few things about setting myself up for success. And so I spent the couple of weeks between orientation and the first night of class preparing my environment, talking to those closest to me, and mentally preparing myself. Confession: I also had a number of “last meals” where I ate whatever I wanted and committed those tastes and textures to memory. I will write more about preparing to begin in a future post but the process itself really set me up for a successful journey.
I have social anxiety. I get nervous in new situations and meeting new people. But luckily I have an amazing health educator, a fabulous clinic full of super positive staff, and a class that had some really nice and positive people in it to provide a safe and supportive environment. The clinic is my safe haven. The first couple months I would show up an hour early sometimes to protect myself from wandering off to a drive-thru because I didn’t know how to spend that hour. I cannot stress how that support helped me get through some tough time. When I felt judgement from others for taking on this diet, I knew I had a judgement free zone.
Judgement is a big thing on this diet. Because you isolate yourself from outside foods, people feel like they can make all sorts of snide and snarky comments to you. I am not open about being on this diet, both because I don’t want my diet to define me, but also because I want to spare myself the nasty comments. If someone asks and seems interested, I will tell them about it. But unlike previous diets where I would declare to everyone what I was doing, I started this one quietly and have remained relatively quiet about it. However through my health classes I have learned how to empower myself and to deal with some of the comments. I know I will have more to face along the journey, but I am building a toolbox of responses.
Cost is the other big hang up for many people on this diet. Yes, the medical tests and supervision is pricey and yes the shakes and entrees cost money. The gym, training sessions, new clothes all cost money as well. You know what else costs money? All the bad food I was eating. All the medical bills I paid. All the unproductive hours where I couldn’t focus and didn’t get things done that needed to be finished. And losing my life day by day to my obesity was the most expensive part of my life. So yes I have depleted some of my savings but I also know I am saving money in the long run. I also know that the improved quality of life is worth the investment. And honestly, I just cut out a bunch of crap I had been wasting it on. Even at happy hour prices those beer and french fry orders add up!
Over the last six months I have been on the road more than half the weekends. I have attended galas and other social events. I have run multiple races. Attended family events. Tried a variety of fitness opportunities. Struggled through exhaustion and stress. Celebrated life and mourned loss. In other words, I have lived. And I have lived “in the box.”
I will be honest. It has not always been easy. And it is getting harder. Because as I see results and feel stronger, I question why I am still in the box. I miss outside food. I feel like I can take a cheat meal… But I won’t. As long as I stay in the box, I am working towards my final goal. This time is truly different and I don’t want to give myself an excuse to halt the journey before I finish it.
I am on a lifelong journey of living the best possible life I can. I believe in myself and my inner strength. And while life happens, I am building skills to pursue health and happiness in spite of life obstacles. It takes dedication and a sense of purpose. But it also takes faith in whatever diet program you choose to pursue. The HMR Diet does work, if you put in the work. I am #HMRStrong.
Why Marriott’s response to racism in their hotels matters
Stepping away from weight-loss for a post and addressing an issue pertinent to some of the other themes of my blog. Something that has been bothering me for awhile but was magnified in recent months by an issue that occurred at the Walnut Creek Marriott in February as well as the response from the parties involved.
Before I begin, I should probably disclose that I am a white woman in my early to mid-thirties. My husband is black. Honestly, being part of a mixed race couple was never something that seemed out of place to me growing up in California. Maybe I am just lucky to have awesome parents who took every opportunity they could to educate me about racial, gender, and cultural sensitivity. Obviously it’s also because I am not a minority, but I never realized just how much microracism existed in our society until I started dating my husband.
When I first learned about the female Marriott employee ignoring the black high school students and educators on the elevator, I was frustrated and upset. I was angry that someone had made my husband and colleagues as well as high school students feel like they were second class citizens. That they were not worthy of a friendly smile and greeting by a member of the hospitality industry.
Here’s how this situation SHOULD have worked out. The woman, when faced with what happened and how it made people feel, should have acknowledged that what she did excluded people of a racial minority. She should have verbally acknowledged that her actions were hurtful. She should have sincerely apologized for the action and the emotional response it caused. What I have learned over nine years is that micro racism isn’t always intentional and even someone with good intentions most of the time can still be a perpetrator of micro racism. I am willing to admit that I too have at some point committed an act of micro aggression and may not have even realized it at the time. This “more subtle, casual form of bigotry” occurs daily and is sometimes so subverted that neither party is aware until the damage is done.
The problem is that the employee didn’t seem to think what she did was wrong. Based on the reactions from management, neither did they. My husband was stopped in an open lobby when it was convenient for management but then not allowed to have the conversation where he had been stopped. He felt confronted publicly but then could not react publicly per management. And in other moves, rather than attempting to arrange an actual meeting about the situation with the black coaches and students, management went to the white organizers to arrange a meeting, bringing another act of micro aggression into the mix.
The problem is escalated and the entire process drawn out, each step another reminder of the otherization committed by this employee. However at every step, no one at Marriott appears to acknowledge how the actions of the employee left their guests feeling.
The denial of racism by Marriott is racism. It is the refusal to recognize the feelings of customers. It is ignorance of how microracism is just as racist and perhaps more damaging than overt racism. And it leaves a sour taste in the mouths of all who learn that the customer isn’t always right if the customer has dark skin.
Because education is important to me, let’s examine some responses that Marriott could have made in addition to the individual employee. First is by going back to corporate roots. According to a letter sent to my husband, Marriott has a long history in dealing with diversity. It sounds like this individual employee (and then the management) should get some retraining. If the member of management had apologized, offered his contact information for follow up, and then acknowledged the stresses and emotional otherization along with arranging for follow-up training for the employee, I am certain in speaking to victims that this would have served as a more appropriate reaction.
When management failed, corporate could have taken similar steps to examine the incident and rather than dismiss the customers, examine the training being given at a corporate level regarding microracism. If employees and management don’t think it’s a “big deal” then there is something more that is wrong that just the initial incident. And then let the customers know that you are following up on the review of the training.
A hospitality company that fails to recognize the emotional harm inflicted by an employee is one that does not care about it’s guests. That’s not the message Marriott probably wants to send to it’s customer base. But when micro aggression goes unchecked and otherization of guests occurs by all levels of the organization, it is unfortunately the one we are left with.
HMR Diet: Spiced Rum Muffins Recipe
As I have worked to increase my physical activity, I have found myself needing to fuel on-the-go. This combined with the travel demands of the job have left me playing with ways to increase the portability of the HMR shakes and cereals. This is one of my go-to recipes. It’s important to remember that these would be a low volume food — I make sure to have at least 8 ounces of water with each serving in order to help with the volume of the meal.
Spiced Rum Muffins
3 HMR Oatmeal packets
3 HMR 70 shakes – vanilla
1/4 cup DaVinci Sugar-Free Chai syrup
1/2 cup DaVinci Sugar-Free Butter Rum syrup
1 and 1/2 cups water
2 tsp baking power
Preheat oven or toaster oven to 350 degrees. Use nonstick cooking spray quickly over mini muffin tins (I find the silicone mini muffin tins to be the easiest).
Begin by mixing the oatmeal, syrups and water in a large microwave safe bowl. Heat for two minutes. Stir and let cool for about five minutes. At this point the oatmeal will have cooked and soaked up much of the liquid but will still be warm. Add the shakes and baking powder by folding them in. The heat from the oatmeal will begin to activate the rising agents and over stirring will deflate the batter. You want those air bubbles being created in order to have fluffier muffins!
Gently spoon batter into muffin tins. Bake for 20-30 minutes depending on your oven calibration – you want a nice brown color on top and a slight firmness to the muffin when you gently touch the top. After removing the pan from the oven, you will want to work to release the muffins from the pan relatively soon after baking or you risk the temperature issues between the heat of the pan and the cool air above causing the muffins to collapse. I like to use a butter knife if I have trouble just popping them out and then I put them on a rack to cool.
After muffins have cooled, I divide the muffins into 9 equal servings. Depending on which pan I use, I either get three or four mini-muffins per serving. I am on HMR Decision Free 3/2 with the 180 shakes, so 1/9 of this recipe counts as half of a shake for me (1/9 of the recipe is like a half an oatmeal or one 70 shake calorically). I then put the servings into snack bags and put them in either the fridge or freezer depending on when I plan on consuming them.
Compliments and the Weight Loss Journey
Weight loss is an incredibly difficult journey. Limiting food. Working out. Avoiding temptations in the Gap. It is a daily struggle regardless of what diet you are on. And at some point, you have that moment where you wonder if it is even worth continuing the struggle.
Enter the compliment.
Starting about 6 weeks into the start of the HMR program, I began to have people notice that I looked different. And at three months, people didn’t hold back their observations.
“Wow you look great!”
“What have you been doing?”
“You are disappearing!”
“Be honest, how many pounds have you lost?”
I have been wanting to write this post for awhile and the topic just keeps growing. I could probably write a book at this point. But I wanted to limit it today to look at some of the positive and negative effects of receiving compliments along the weight loss journey.
There are negatives?
Quite a bit actually. I have been struggling for months holding back responses to some of the compliments I have received both because I struggle to accept praise but also because some are just thoughtless. For example, a coworker who you aren’t close to walks up and says “Wow! How much weight have you lost this week?” It catches you off-guard. It defines your interaction by asking for a number. It treats you not as a person worthy of talking to but rather a “let’s get to the point, you look better and I want to know how much better you look now by placing a number on it.”
Asking someone who has lost weight “how much” is asking them to quantify a struggle into something we are told shouldn’t be our driving force. Week after week I get on a scale and sometimes I get a big decrease numerically and some weeks it’s barely a blip. Asking me in a week where I worked out hours every day, followed the diet to the letter, and the scale doesn’t respond is absolutely discouraging. Because you stole my other accomplishments away from me. I felt like a rockstar, and now I *only* lost a pound.
Additionally, why am I now getting your attention? The number of “good for you” type compliments I have gotten have gotten to the point where I asked my husband outright “do they know how condescending they sound?” He explained that most people don’t know what to say, and many aren’t able to take on the challenge themselves. They think it’s complimentary but the compliments come out sounding backhanded like I am a good puppy who is following orders and it’s about damn time I took care of myself. Because all of those previous times I struggled and was less successful weren’t worthy of the acknowledgement but this time I deserve praise. “Good for you girl. Sit. Drink a shake.”
It’s hard for people to respond to big changes involving sensitive subjects like weight loss. I completely understand. And in many instances, compliments are big motivators! But don’t come up and pinch me and tell me how skinny I am getting (yup that’s happened) and stop trying to quantify my accomplishments. I will tell you my personal number if I feel like we are in a place where I can share.
This weekend was a tipping point for me with regards to compliments. I am at an event where I am seeing people who I haven’t seen for a couple of months or more. So I spent the week mentally preparing for reaction. I got my hair done as a reward for hitting 75 pounds (to be more specific, that’s 76 pounds lost since November 13), I brought some of my new clothes that I feel comfortable in, and I mentally talked myself through how to accept compliments, no matter what form, with grace.
This weekend is also a struggle because of the delicious foods and lack of time for physical activity. Tournaments are like that. Super intense. Lots of responsibility. Constantly on the go. And they keep you going by fueling with high calorie tempting goodness.
A positive of the compliments is that it keeps me motivated to stay on plan. In the past, when I started getting compliments, I would get complacent. I would slack on “the diet” because I was “looking good” so it didn’t matter anymore. However on HMR it’s different. Still on the Decision Free diet, I would have to completely derail and go out of “the box” to slack. And knowing how far I have come and how far I have to go, I don’t want to slack. So reframing the compliments as motivation to continue has helped me stay in the box and avoid temptation. As I learn to accept the positive motivation behind the compliments and ignore the pinching and quantification, I can channel the encouragement behind the comments and use that positive energy.
I am #HMRStrong and I can do this. I appreciate your compliments but I also know that success doesn’t rest on your feedback. It requires my internal motivation. But I accept your positive energy and I will continue to learn to reframe those who may mean well but may lack an understanding of my struggle.
“Thank you. I have been working hard. I am healthier.”
Savory HMR Mustard Chicken
Walking through Whole Foods today I was hit by a delicious smell. Suddenly I wanted whatever that delicious smell was. However, now that I am on the HMR Decision Free diet, that wasn’t an option. So instead I decided to dissect the smells and see if I could make an “In the Box” option.
I have no idea what the actual dish I smelled was but the underlying scents were vinegar and mustard. Thus, this dish was born!
Warning: if you don’t like vinegar or mustard, this probably isn’t your cup of tea.
Mustard Chicken and Rice
HMR Savory Chicken Entree
1 tbsp German mustard (or your favorite spicy mustard that meets HMR guidelines)
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1/2 tbsp capers, drained
1/8 tsp smoked paprika
1/8 tsp smoked salt
1/8 tsp ground pepper
1/8 tsp flake salt
Heat savory chicken in microwave.
Whisk all other ingredients together.
Plate entree with rice on the bottom of the bowl topped with the mushrooms and carrots and finally the chicken. Pour sauce over chicken and enjoy.
Thai Steak & Potatoes – HMR Style!
One of the women in my HMR classes have been making a version of this for months (you can find her version here) and I have been using her recipe as a base to create my own version. I make the sauce in single servings ahead of time and keep them in the fridge. You can toss an entree in the microwave and then add the sauce but if I have the time and patience, I like to throw the entree in a saucepan and cook it low and slow with the sauce for a deeper flavor.
I make this with the HMR Steak & Potatoes entree but I bet it would be good with a few others!
HMR Decision Free Thai Peanut Sauce
1 tbsp PB2
1 tbsp low-sodium soy sauce
1 tbsp rice vinegar
1 tsp powdered garlic
1/2 tsp powdered ginger
1/4 tsp imitation coconut extract
Whisk together and let sit for the flavors to meld.
HMR Mocha: On the Go and In the Box!
If you haven’t read my blog before, you may be unaware that I am always on the go. Which means I don’t always have the luxury to make shakes in the comfort of my kitchen.
That said, I love fancy coffees and giving up those special treats was difficult. Luckily, with the help of my travel milk frother, I have been coming up with some on-the-go specialties!
This one is the easiest and is a favorite staple in my current rotation. Order a medium black coffee in a large coffee cup (in Sbux speak that’s a grande in an venti cup!). That gives you room to add an HMR chocolate shake packet and optional sweetener (none for me). Then froth that baby up! The travel milk frother breaks down the shake powder and blends inside the coffee cup while adding a light froth on top. Enjoy!
Losing *only* two pounds … A 19-week reflection on the HMR Diet
Last night was my 133rd day staying “in the box” on the HMR Decision Free diet.
On my first night of class, my health educator showed us a graph. It showed data that the longer a person stayed “in the box” (eating only HMR food), the higher the likelihood they would stick with the program and the average amount of weight lost. The data included everything from the probability of success if you “cheated” the first week all the way up to 19 weeks.
So I bought a small white board and decorated it with permanent marker after calculating how many days were in 19 weeks. I then used a white board marker to update the number of the board. And then I set that board where I would see it every time I entered the kitchen. I also kept some helpful tools within reach, as you can see in the photo.
The first few weeks, it was struggle each day to stay in the box. But knowing I would have to reset that number was motivation to keep going. And changing the board felt like a triumphant win!
Eventually, I stopped updating each day and would change it every couple of days. However on a difficult day, the visual was a good reminder of how far I have come and how I didn’t want to reset the board after so much work.
Today is my 134th day on the diet. I still plan on keeping the board alive, but I am in the process of setting new goals. Goals to keep me going.
Because I can’t rely on the scale for motivation.
When I get on the scale at the clinic, I try to imagine what the new number will be. In the beginning there were huge jumps most weeks. Some were two or three pounds but many were four to six. And I knew logically that it would slow down as I had less to lose and my body adjusted to a lower-calorie diet.
The last three weeks I have lost one pound, four pounds, and then two pounds. In the real world, losing seven pounds in three weeks is a big deal. And I know I would have been so happy on previous diets with that loss. Yet last night, with a two pound loss on the scale, I felt disappointment.
Practical me knows that this process is going to be an ultra-marathon. That it’s a lifestyle change. That it won’t happen over night. And that I have works for 19 weeks but I knew going in that it would be a much longer process. Finally, I know that I have gotten stronger and have had so many non-scale victories that I should dance with joy.
Today I begin the process of setting new long-term non-scale goals. From fitness goals I am currently working on, to food based goals I need to figure out. I am determined to succeed one day at a time.
Traveling on the HMR Diet
I have been on the HMR Decision Free Diet for almost 16 full weeks. During those 16 weeks, I have flown away for weekend work (and one personal trip) for 8 weekends and spent another 4 weekends at regional competitions. With 12 weekends away from the comfort and safety of my home environment, I have quickly learned some skills for traveling on the HMR DF Diet and I am looking forward to sharing some of them now!
First, let’s dispel some rumors. I have carried entrees and shakes through airport security every trip and have never been stopped. However, I would always recommend carrying some documentation of your medically supervised diet just in case you get a TSA agent with his britches in a bunch claiming HMR chili is a liquid.
Second, the majority of hotels I have encountered have been amenable to placing a mini-fridge and in most cases a microwave in my hotel room free of charge provided I show the medical necessity (same documentation). Many never needed to see it, I just needed to ask and explain.
Third, if you haven’t already figured it out, many of the entrees can be eaten cold. I will be honest… I am NOT a fan of most of them at room temperature. My stand-by is Five Bean Casserole (add a packet of salt and a packet of pepper and maybe a squeeze of mustard from an airport food court and you’re golden). I will also do the chicken parm and the ravioli and the lasagna. It’s up to personal preference.
Two great on-the-go shaker bottles… liquid included!
When I am checking a bag for a longer trip, I like to travel light with the carry-on. This means packing as compactly as possible. First, I fold up two of the 800 packets and one 70 packet into my standard Blender Bottle along with a plastic spoon. This prevents the wire ball from bouncing around, saves space, and gives me an easy pudding and two shakes!
I also pack at least one Mio or Crystal Light squeeze bottle for easy to-go flavoring in my liquids bag. Great for making shakes different flavors and perfect to add to a club soda on a plane for a “fancy” drink!
However, I hate cleaning when traveling and thus when I get through airport security, I am often on the hunt for one of the stand-by beverages pictured above. It makes a perfect disposable shake container. Just swirl your shake powder before shaking or the powder may all end up in the lid!
This was my HMR meal at the San Diego Zoo. Just drink half the bottle, add shake mix, swirl and shake to your desired consistency! Mmmmm Chocolate Lemon Goodness!
I am also a big fan of mixing up the flavors of my entrees and having other savory options available to me is a big way I have managed to stay “In the Box” while “On the Road.” I always have a couple of bouillon cubes in a snack bag (to keep the smell contained) as well as a couple of tea bags for on-the-go hot beverage choices. I also carry a travel milk frother (mine has a cute carrying case!) which I use to whisk hot liquids for soup and hot chocolate shakes.
Additionally, I carry a menagerie of seasonings in a travel pill case (pictured below) which I place in a sandwich bag (because I am paranoid about spills but haven’t had one yet!). You can put all of your favorites in here! These are just some of my standards.
Turn your pill case into a travel condiment container!
Another way to make travel easier and make you feel included when others are eating carby goodness, is to make some HMR muffins (I make these without the frosting) ahead of time. I don’t do this often because I want to avoid over-relying on low-volume foods. However I have found packing these can save me in a pinch when everyone else is noshing on trigger foods plus these don’t require preparation. This is one I save for super high stress weekends (I also make these using a mini-donut pan that fits in my toaster oven which makes them smaller – I get more and they are easier to pack!).
Make muffins ahead of time for packable meals.
Traveling can be difficult on the HMR diet, or any diet, because of the temptations that lie in the Gap and all of the fabulous looking foods that abound. It is much harder to control your environment and at some point in the future I will talk more about how I prepare mentally for travel. However in the meantime, I hope these travel tips are helpful for those who have travel in their future!
100 Days on the HMR Diet
I keep wanting to write posts but as per usual, I can barely keep my head above water during the competition season. And I have been taking all my spare time and spending it earning PA (HMR Speak for exercise or Physical Activity calories).
However Friday, February 21, marked a special day. I have been on the HMR Decision-Free diet and “In The Box” for 100 days straight. I feel like being able to stick with anything for 100 days is gosh darn near impossible and worth a mini-celebration and reflection.
First, the question you want answered if you are anything like I was before this diet… How much weight have I lost?
When I weighed in on the first night, I was 280 pounds. My height is approximately 5’4″ which would be a BMI of 48.1, which according to the calculator on the Stanford Hospital site made me “morbidly obese.”
Fourteen weeks later (or 98 days), my weight at the clinic was 220 pounds. While my BMI is still an unhealthy 37.8, it dropped me down to the “obese” category and is a loss of 60 pounds (an average of just over 4 pounds a week).
So I lost weight. Which is ultimately expected when you don’t veer off a medically-supervised diet. But what else?
I feel so much better about myself. I feel like I can do anything I set out to do, including lose the rest of this weight. I have more energy and actually crave physical activity (really? did I just write that?).
After 100 days, the selection of 14 or so entrees, oatmeal, soup, and shakes may seem old. Yes, if I have to eat another cold five-bean casserole at a competition soon I may throw it at someone. However for the most part, I have been enjoying trying new seasonings and preparation methods as well as rediscovering some of my favorites from the first couple of weeks.
Also, and this is so foreign to me, life isn’t always about food. Lately I have been primarily focused on food as fuel to get me through the new activities I am discovering. I don’t revolve my life around what my next meal will be, I just eat when it’s the appropriate time before or after a workout or when I am hungry. And I am learning a ton about what size meal I actually need to stay full as opposed to what I used to pile and clean off my massive plates.
I still have a long journey ahead and I know there will be bumps along the way. However after 100 days, I feel like I am over the mental hurdle of “can I do this?” and have moved on to “what else can I achieve?” And that may be the best takeaway from these past 100 days.
HMR Diet “Chips & Dip” Recipe
I have been missing snacks foods, especially chips & dip. While this isn’t an exact replica, it totally gets the job done!
Ingredients
HMR Enchilada Entree
Flakey Salt
Hot Sauce
Lay a silpat mat on a toaster over cookie sheet. I find this is much easier to clean than other methods.
Clean the enchilada “tortillas” from the sauce and filling, reserve those for the dip. Be careful when unraveling the enchiladas as the tortillas tend to break along where they’ve been folded.
Lay tortillas on silpat and sprinkle lightly with sea salt (optional).
Bake at 325 in toaster oven for approximately 30 minutes, turning over halfway through. The chips will not get fully crispy before they start to brown. They will harden a bit more after removing from oven so don’t let them burn waiting for them to get crispy in the oven.
When removed, use pizza cutter to cut “chips” into smaller pieces. They may harden more while resting.
Meanwhile, mix enchilada sauce and filling with hot sauce (heat varies by user). Heat for 30-45 seconds in microwave.
Some of my chips have not been strong enough to scoop but then I just spoon dip onto them to enjoy.
It’s definitely a different way to enjoy this entree and a great meal to have when hanging around with friends watching a sports game or a movie. Enjoy!
My HMR entree “fix”
I have been in a delicious rut and it’s not going anywhere any time soon.
Savory chicken entrees are some of the most versatile of the HMR line and let me share my recent staple fix.
Pan “fry” the rice in a nonstick pan. I spritz the rice “cake” with two spritzes of Bragg Liquid Aminos to flavor it but sometimes do it plain. Often I can “cut” the cake like pictures into three but often it just ends up a delicious mess of rice.
Chop up the chicken tenders and pan “fry” until brown and then drizzle Frank’s Red Hot Wings Sauce (the one that’s zero calories – thank me later).
Finally, pan “fry” the veggies with a dash of low sodium soy sauce and a very light sprinkle of Chinese five spice.
Seriously the best fix ever!
The Healthy Academic 